Why deny it? Even better. Let's talk about it.
My buddy's Mom died a few days before Christmas. She was 70. I cut out the obituary and brought it back from my trip to TX.
He seemed to take it pretty well. Didn't really want a shoulder to cry on. Just wanted to try to recover his strength from the ordeal and get his bearings again. He talked about it some. But mostly just seemed concerned with the details of the funeral and making all of the surviving folks happy with the terms of the final settlements. The question of money seemed to come up among them all more consistently than any other topic. You'd think at a time like that it would be most apparent that you don't take it with you, but wasn't the case. Once again, this life took precedence over the next. God must have a hell of a lot of patience.
Folks get upset over strange things when people die. Little things to most of us. The wording of an obit. Where people sit at the memorial service. They seem to re-write history especially for the occasion. Makes me wonder how skewed my own perspectives might be. I hope I put emphasis on the here and now, being present, being aware, and loving and giving as I go forward. Looking back doesn't seem to provide much use if we change the past to suit our sensitivities.
My grandmother used to send me $5 for my birthday and would tell me to go out and buy a Coke. I think she had it right. Money is for giving and life is for living.
Saturday, January 29, 2011
Dr. Grady
Dr. Tanya Grady-Weliky was the Associate Dean for Medical Education here at OHSU. She died last week. Had been ill for some time. Left behind a husband and a beautiful little daughter. My heart just aches for them.
I know they will eventually work through the change, but the sadness never really goes away. It will always sit beside you if you open the door and invite it in. It fades but remains for this life.
She was a devoted and heartfelt person. She loved her life and gave all she had every day. I imagine there were times I expected more of her and had no idea she had dipped far deeper into her reserves than I had that day. I resolve to slip into the shoes of others however I might and know their struggles, wear their integrity, cry their tears.
My prayer is that those close to her will find peace and joy in her memory and be guided by her spirit of kindness and love. She was terrific.
I know they will eventually work through the change, but the sadness never really goes away. It will always sit beside you if you open the door and invite it in. It fades but remains for this life.
She was a devoted and heartfelt person. She loved her life and gave all she had every day. I imagine there were times I expected more of her and had no idea she had dipped far deeper into her reserves than I had that day. I resolve to slip into the shoes of others however I might and know their struggles, wear their integrity, cry their tears.
My prayer is that those close to her will find peace and joy in her memory and be guided by her spirit of kindness and love. She was terrific.
Just Write Something...
That's what I keep telling myself.
I've been writing to folks all over the country and neglecting the blog. Seems like I come up with a great topic at least once a week, dutifully record it into the voice recorder on my phone, and then promptly do nothing with it. I justify with the "isn't a priority task right now" justification.
So much has happened in the last couple of months. Took a drive to TX searching for a little adventure and dropped off a computer at my parents, so I could Skype with my Dad who can't hear much at all. Stopped off in Jackson, WY on the way back just to see the place and whether I could get stuck in the snow. Not even close. In fact, took a back road over a pass from Star Valley via Idaho 34 to Soda Springs just cuz it looked impassable. My little Bunyai (car) killed that road. Rocked it at over 60 in places. Nothing but snow-covered roads the whole way. Just gorgeous scenery.
Jackson looks like a great place to spend at least part of the year. Might be a spot to set up headquarters for something. People were nice, and it wasn't all that expensive. Sure there were plenty of goofball, high-end stores around and property and homes going for 5 times what they were worth, but there were plenty of places that were reasonable. Stayed in a nice chain motel for $35 a night. Okay... Cheaper than Portland for the very same thing. Definitely on my radar now.
Been going to the clinical class for the last 2 months (PCM). There was some overlap from the time I left and when this class ends, so it made sense for me to start at its beginning. Good thing, too. It changed. For the better, I might add. I understand the epidemiology much better, and my clinical skills are much more refined. Working at the sliding scale clinic (SW Community Clinic) has made a tremendous difference for me - and hopefully for the patients I have been so privileged to work with. Advice to prospectives: go to clinic and take on all the responsibility you can get. Read charts, think through your differential, look up diseases, become familiar with treatments. Huge.
Guess I'm ready to go back. I do like learning. Just hope it will be relevant to real life.
I've been writing to folks all over the country and neglecting the blog. Seems like I come up with a great topic at least once a week, dutifully record it into the voice recorder on my phone, and then promptly do nothing with it. I justify with the "isn't a priority task right now" justification.
So much has happened in the last couple of months. Took a drive to TX searching for a little adventure and dropped off a computer at my parents, so I could Skype with my Dad who can't hear much at all. Stopped off in Jackson, WY on the way back just to see the place and whether I could get stuck in the snow. Not even close. In fact, took a back road over a pass from Star Valley via Idaho 34 to Soda Springs just cuz it looked impassable. My little Bunyai (car) killed that road. Rocked it at over 60 in places. Nothing but snow-covered roads the whole way. Just gorgeous scenery.
Jackson looks like a great place to spend at least part of the year. Might be a spot to set up headquarters for something. People were nice, and it wasn't all that expensive. Sure there were plenty of goofball, high-end stores around and property and homes going for 5 times what they were worth, but there were plenty of places that were reasonable. Stayed in a nice chain motel for $35 a night. Okay... Cheaper than Portland for the very same thing. Definitely on my radar now.
Been going to the clinical class for the last 2 months (PCM). There was some overlap from the time I left and when this class ends, so it made sense for me to start at its beginning. Good thing, too. It changed. For the better, I might add. I understand the epidemiology much better, and my clinical skills are much more refined. Working at the sliding scale clinic (SW Community Clinic) has made a tremendous difference for me - and hopefully for the patients I have been so privileged to work with. Advice to prospectives: go to clinic and take on all the responsibility you can get. Read charts, think through your differential, look up diseases, become familiar with treatments. Huge.
Guess I'm ready to go back. I do like learning. Just hope it will be relevant to real life.
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